21st Century Cosmodemonic

A jandal from the inside

Monday, December 19, 2005


A lot of people think that endearing and irritating are antonyms, never to be accurate adjectives of the same behaviour. Others, who have half a clue, think that there is a fine line between endearing and irritating, which is crossed at one's peril. A small chuckle can be followed quickly by a hearty slap if the line is misjudged.

A little guide:

Badly singing Hey Mickey you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind hey Mickey to your partner, maybe even switching names for better effect, is endearing. (Of course, it really does depend on delivery here, but I'm assuming you know what you're doing, and can pull it off. If not, don't try it. It's not something I'd ever actually try, but I would try to be endeared (yes it's a word, look it up, ok don't. Just trust me.) if it happened to me.) Singing two lines is endearing and irritating. Singing the whole thing gets you shot.

Of course singing the whole of the I like Pina Coladas... making love in the rain song is acceptable at anytime if only becasue it will demonstrate a remarkable retention of so-bad-they're-good lyrics.

Going on a trip with only the Killers CD, so it turns into the soundtrack of your holiday, is fun. Going on two is fun and irritating. If it happens a third time there will be payment extracted somehow from someone.

Someone ties my shoe laces together while I'm napping, I can laugh along. Someone shaves an eyebrow, I'll laugh, but just watch it. But if anyone ever takes my contraband morphine supply smuggled from the sick room where the cute nurse secretly loves me, and replaces it with jelly crystals, sugar pills from contraceptive packs, and sherbert again, there'll be Mr T. style Trouble, fool. But without the pity.

Anyway, I'm back now, and nearly normal again.


Anonymous Chillylounge said...

I pity that fool who steals your morphine lackey! I had the same problem once when someone replaced my drug supply with sherbert... let's just say that I wasn't a happy little chappy. Anywhooo, welcome back to Cosmodemonic mate. Things were so much more productive when you were sick and as you know, we can't have any of that now can we!

10:41 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wonder where singing 100 bottles of beer on the wall in a not so great voice for 3 hours lies on the endearing-irritating spectrum?

10:38 am  
Blogger Lackey said...

My god chillylounge, this drug spiking is reaching epidemic proportions. Something must be done. I shall implement an Anti-Drug-Spiking Initiative as son as I can find the right paperwork!

And anonymous, why don't you try it and see? I'm picking it's closer to punch-in-the-face than to kiss-cos-its-cute. But you never know...

3:01 pm  

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